April 1st 2008

Democrats
Despite efforts from Democratic Chairman Howard Dean, the war between Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama continues. McCain hopes that like the war in Iraq, the Obama-Hillary war also lasts more than a hundred years.

Bush
The Bush Library Foundation is looking for a new website after www.GeorgeWBushLibrary.com, a domain they owned, expired and was bought by other company. They immediately tried with Bushlibrary.com but that site is owned already by Spitzer, Paterson and Kwame Kilpatrick to depict their conquests.

President Bush threw out the first pitch for the Washington Nationals Sunday. The pitch was high, so much so it hit the price of gas.

CPR
The American Heart Association said that hands-only CPR which means performing chest compressions without mouth-to-mouth works just as well for patients who are in cardiac arrest. The number of saved lives is expected to increase if we count the number of ugly people that had been left unattended before.

Nomophobia
A company in England coined the term “nomophobia", for those people who are afraid of not being able to use a mobile phone. In the U.S. we call them Sprint users.

Yahoo
Yahoo is launching a new website devoted to women between the ages of 25 and 54. There’s no much effort in it, just a link to Oprah’s site.

Gore
Al Gore celebrated his birthday yesterday. Don’t let him fool you, the numerous candles were not because he cares about global warming and don't want to use electricity, he’s just turning 60.

Hillary
Hillary Rodham Clinton’s struggling presidential campaign owes $292,000 in unpaid health insurance premiums for her campaign staff. Hillary justified it by saying that her staff is not the one under sniper fire.

Students
A new report by the nonprofit America's Promise Alliance found that only about half the students in 17 of the nation's 50 largest cities actually get a diploma. Teachers claimed that they are working to increase that number but they cannot have sex with all of them.