July 7th 2006

Happy Birthday Mr. President
President Bush celebrated yesterday his 60th birthday. Bush received congratulatory phone calls from the Russian and the Chinese president. They both promised to send their presents in the head of the next North Korean Missile.

The Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper, visiting the White House, brought birthday greetings and also a belt buckle for president Bush. Apparently the Prime Minister thinks all presidents in the States are like Bill Clinton and need help keeping their pants up.

Bush senior celebrated his 80th birthday with a parachute jump from 13,000 ft in the sky. On his 60th birthday George Bush tried to emulate his father, but it wasn't quite as brave, he just jumped from his own ratings.

More Happy Birthdays
Rapper 50 Cent turned 31 yesterday and from now onwards, due to the heavy inflation , he'll be called 47 cents and a half.

Rapper 50 Cent and president Bush's birthdays fall on the same day. There are some similarities between them, one of them was shot 9 times when younger, the other, when younger, had 9 nine shots of tequila on one night.

Ken Lay in Peace
Some skeptics believe that former Enron founder, Ken Lay faked his death and underwent plastic surgery to escape his prison sentence. According to experts Ken Lay will never be found because he now wears a turban, grew a long beard, he is now more than 6 ft. tall and carries a dialysis machine with him all the time.

Emmies
The Academy of Television Arts & Sciences announced the nominations for the 58th Primetime Emmy Awards. There were no surprises, specially in the horror genre where the US soccer team and its performance in the World Cup got all the nominations