August 8th 2006

Mel Gibson

Mel Gibson will enter a rehab center to recover of his alcohol addiction. The actor said he is sorry for his anti-Semite remarks and he is committed to stick to his 12 goose step program.

Mel Gibson is trying to make amends with the Jewish community and promised to remake the Passion of The Christ. Apparently in the newest version Jesus is not crucified by the Jews and only gets 10 days of community service.

Tom Cruise
Tom Cruise might become unemployed because the Hollywood studio that bankrolls Tom Cruise’s films is not backing any more of his movies until he agrees to a significant pay cut. According to Cruise’s friends, the actor will now be forced to show his daughter Suri to collect a more substantial government aid.

Cindy Sheehan
Cindy Sheehan marched again a mile and a half toward Bush's ranch. This time she claimed she wanted to see President Bush not to protest about the war but to return the Tupperware from Laura’s welcome cake.

Fidel Castro
Cuba's vice president Carlos Lage told reporters that Castro will reassume the presidency within weeks. He also said Castro’s health is fine and that the reason why he had to be hospitalized was because he choked on a pretzel.

Young Americans
A poll of Americans age 18 to 24 found Bush's approval rating was only 20 percent. Young Americans claim that with the huge deficit the only space they are going to be able to afford in the future will be in Myspace.

A poll of Americans age 18 to 24 found Bush's approval rating was only 20 percent. Most of the 20 % came from kids that used to get drunk with the twins......

Google
Google will warn anyone using the search engine who clicks on a link to a site identified as harmful for your computer. So far the only site that raises a flag for Google is yahoo.com.

KISS
KISS front-man Gene Simmons is said to be very frustrated because his band was excluded this year from the Hall of Fame. He said he is going to take actions immediately and release the no-inducted-KISS dolls for sale.