February 22nd 2007

Hi there, there are few things that made today a really good day.... Manu Ginobili scored 40 points for the San Antonio Spurs (he scored 40 yesterday) I was on the air in the Bob Rivers Show and Newsday published one of my jokes (Thanks Ken, you rock!)
http://www.newsday.com/news/opinion/ny-oppun5103876feb22,0,6468466.story
If you want to continue making this day a really good one for me, just enjoy the jokes.......

British Troops
Vice president Dick Cheney said Wednesday that Britain's decision to withdraw 1,600 troops from Iraq is a positive sign that fits with the overall strategy for stabilizing Iraq. He cut short the press conference because he said he had a breakfast meeting consisting of coffee, orange juice and "Freedom Muffins."

The British announced they are pulling 1,600 troops from Iraq. Apparently the soldiers will be deployed to America to protect Simon Cowell from crazy Paula Abdul and some of the distraught American Idol Contestants.

Prime Minister Tony Blair has announced plans to remove 1,500 British soldiers from Iraq by the end of the year. Some Republican congressmen want now to pass a law making Spanish the official language in America.

Prime Minister Tony Blair has announced plans to remove 1,500 British soldiers from Iraq by the end of the year. Country stations all over the country are inviting their listeners to burn Beatles’ albums.

Heather Mills
Heather Mills will be joining the cast of "Dancing with the Stars". The news created excitement among TV viewers who cannot wait to see her dancing the LIMB-o Dance.......

Britney Spears
The Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services is receiving numerous calls from people in the tabloid-reading public who are concerned about Britney Spears’ kids. Apparently the 2 babies have been car racing along Sunset Boulevard.

Find the Illegal
The Republican club at New York University will take part in a game called "Find the Illegal Immigrant" which according to Republican students it’s a much easier game than finding Osama Bin Laden.

Republican Students at New York University are planning a game involving hunting an illegal on campus. Apparently it is part of the curriculum for "Vice President 101."

Psychic
Psychic Ulf Buck says he can read people's futures by feeling their buttocks. I can see my future by feeling somebody else’s buttocks: jail!