October 1st 2006

Mark Foley
Six-term Republican Rep. Mark Foley resigned following reports he sent sexually inappropriate e-mails to underage male congressional interns. Foley was running again for congress, and political experts believe what he did is known in politics as the "Seventh term itch"

Rep. Mark Foley resigned after the revelation that he exchanged raunchy electronic messages with a teenage boy . In one of the instant messages the congressman asked the boy to send a photo of himself. According to Foley he wanted to be sure the boy wasn’t an old hairy CIA agent or a reporter of the Washington Times.

Rep. Mark Foley resigned after the revelation that he exchanged raunchy electronic messages with a teenage boy, a former congressional page. On his resignation speech the congressman quote two famous contemporary politicians: I’m a gay American, and I did not have sexual relationships with that boy.

Interrogation Bill
The voting of the detainee interrogation bill brought a long discussion on the true meaning of the word torture. According to linguists the word torture has as many meanings as the word Macaca.

Republicans succeeded this week in pushing through a new detainee interrogation bill. Now that more methods of interrogations are allowed we won’t have to stick to the triangle as the only geometrical shape to pile prisoners.

Allen
Senator George Allen appeared on Fox News Channel to deny he is a racist. He claimed he never used any racial epithets and that the noose decorating his law office doesn’t have any racist meaning; he just had it there because after the macaca incident he is going to use the noose to commit electoral suicide.

Midterm Elections
Media analysts believe that the dropping in the price of gas and the market reaching its highest point in 7 years are fabricated scenarios to make people feel good before the upcoming midterm election. If things get so good before the elections, shouldn’t we have elections every month then?

Last two Fridays have been quite harmful for the political aspirations of the GOP. First an intel report saying the war in Iraq is creating more terrorists and last Friday Rep. Mark Foley resigned over explicit e-mails. Democratic strategists are thinking of passing a bill to move the weekends to Sundays and Mondays so people won’t forget so quickly what occurred on Fridays.