November 15th 2006

Internet
According to a U.S. government-commissioned study, only about 1% of web sites are sexually explicit. Unfortunately nobody knows what the other 99% is about.

OJ
Fox Network plans to broadcast an interview with O.J. Simpson in which the former football star discusses "how he would have committed" the slayings of his ex-wife and her friend. I might be wrong but wasn’t Fox Network against "Cut and Run"?

Tom Cruise
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are set to marry at an undisclosed Italian location on Saturday. The place is going to be protected from Paparazzis; the guests of the bride will arrive in helicopters; and the guests of the groom, in space ships.

L.A. gossip columnists say Katie Holmes was seen this week buying more than $3,000 worth of lingerie at a West Hollywood store. She bought several thongs and bras, and that was only for Tom to wear.

L.A. gossip columnists say Katie Holmes was seen this week buying more than $3,000 worth of lingerie at a West Hollywood store. It is quite unfair; with a woman like that of course nobody needs antidepressants.

Fox News
According to Palestinian terror groups, Fox News paid $2 Million dollars for the release of two Fox reporters kidnapped by terrorists last summer. A spokeswoman for Fox News Channel made it clear they would have paid $20 millions if they had to, because it is extremely hard to find reporters that want to work with Bill O’ Reilly and Sean Hannity.

According to news websites, Fox News paid $2 Million dollars for the release of two Fox reporters kidnapped by terrorists last summer. The terrorists now claim they used the money to buy weapons and political ads for Democrats in the midterm elections.

Giuliani
Former New York mayor Rudy Giuliani has taken the first step in a run for president in 2008. Political analysts predict what could be a brutal battle between Giulani and Clinton in 08. Not Hilary, Bill, with whom he’ll have to compete for the women of Capitol Hill.

Nancy Pelosi
Convicted lobbyist Jack Abramoff provided information that could incriminate six to eight Democratic senators in corruption scandals. Soon to be speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi said that now that the Democratic Party has the majority in both houses, they are going to work hard to increase that number to more than eight.

In other news....
According to a study by the Christiana Care Health System in Newark, Delaware, white people are more likely to get CPR than black people. Probably because nobody will dare punch a black person on the chest.