May 31st 2007

Great News....I finished this month on a high note thanks to mi amigo Ken and his great site in Newsday. One of my jokes made it there!!
http://www.newsday.com/search/ny-oppun5235873may31,0,466607.story
Thanks Ken and Newsday and those who come back everyday to visit this site.
Pedro

Tuberculosis
Health officials in North America are looking for passenger lists for two trans-Atlantic airline flights in their effort to find about 80 people who sat near a honeymooner infected with a dangerous drug-resistant form of tuberculosis. Forget the passengers; they just sat next to him. What about the poor airport screener that was in charge of cavity searching him?

Peacefulness
The United States is way down the list in a magazine's assessment of the peacefulness of 121 countries. U.S officials said that the poll is unfair and the United States suffers because it is the world's policeman, and apparently the world is Rodney King.

Canada was placed eighth in a magazine's assessment of the peacefulness of 121 countries. They should have been placed at the top but some naughty Canadian Mounted policeman must have used foul language.

Sports
FIFA, the main soccer federation, banned high-altitude stadiums from being used for international matches. Fortunately for Michael Vick and tons of football players, the NFL doesn’t have the same policy of banning games played high in the U.S.

Al Gore
Some environmentalist fans complained to Al Gore that his latest book "Assault on Reason" doesn’t do much to protect the environment. The vice president denied those allegations and said that most people that read it feel compelled to recycle by using the book to wipe their butts.

Al-Qaeda
An American member of al-Qaeda who escaped from a U.S. prison in Afghanistan turned up in an online video warning president Bush of future attacks. The video was released right in time for Barbara Walters to consider him as a replacement for Rosie O’Donnell.

Kobe
Kobe Bryant threatened with living the L. A. Lakers because according to the NBA star the team's front office is "a mess". Last time Bryant said that a room was a mess he ended up calling the concierge and we all know the rest of the story.