January 17th 2008

Hi everybody, I just want to share the good news. Newsday published one of my jokes. Thanks Newsday and Mr. Rasak for choosing one of my jokes, it makes me very proud to se my name up there with true comedians like Leno, Maher and others. Thanks a lot. Here's the link
http://www.newsday.com/news/opinion/ny-oppun175540354jan17,0,4165507.story

Democratic Candidates
Democratic candidates are now courting the black vote in South Carolina. Hillary and Obama have scheduled speeches at various churches, and Edwards went to his hairdresser and asked for cornrows.

OJ
O.J Simpson’s bail was doubled yesterday to $250,000 or in O.J’s currency: The Jacket he wore at the murder trial, the tires of the truck he drove to run away, and 25 autographed balls.

Britney
Hollywood insiders say that the paparazzo Britney is going out with sees Britney as an ATM machine… Same shape.

Middle East
During his visit to the Middle East, President Bush performed a traditional sword fighting dance with a prince of the royal family. When Larry Craig heard about a sword dance, he immediately begged his friends in the White House for an Ambassador position in the Middle East.

Dogs
Scientists at the Eötvös Loránd University in Hungary have developed a computer that can "translate" dog barks. Fortunately for Michael Vick he has already been sentenced.

Hillary
Hillary Clinton impersonated a flight attendant on Wednesday as her new campaign plane made its first voyage with journalists, staff and the candidate herself on board. Still nobody beats Obama when it comes to getting high.

Hillary Clinton impersonated a flight attendant on Wednesday as her new campaign plane made its first flight. When she gave passengers the safety procedures, all the exits were on the left.

Eddy Murphy
Just two weeks after having a non-binding wedding ceremony overseas, Eddie Murphy and his girlfriend have broken up. According to Murphy’s wife, he behaved like an ass all the time.

Mitt Romney
During his campaign in South Carolina, Mitt Romney said he’s got a plan to revive the textile industry. It is a pretty simple plan: set air conditionings on 30 degrees so that everybody will have to wear sweaters.