July 7th 2008

Gas
A Pray at the Pump Movement, has been holding prayer vigils at gas stations across the country asking God to lower the price of gas. Apparently, they don’t know that God is first answering the prayers of those who wanted to lose weight by forcing people to walk and ride bicycles.

A Pray at the Pump Movement, has been holding prayer vigils at gas stations across the country asking God to lower the price of gas. Because you need to look at the sky for help, that’s where the price of gas went lately.

A Pray at the Pump Movement, has been holding prayer vigils at gas stations across the country asking God to lower the price of gas. Not to be confused with those kneeling near the cars trying to soak up the drops of gas or to siphon the neighbors' cars.

Senator John Warner of Virginia is proposing a return to the National Speed Limit of 55 mph so people can save money on gas. That’s really a lame idea, because if cars slow down by the time you arrive at the gas station the price already went up.

Starting next month, thousands of government employees in Utah will only work 4 days per week in an effort aimed at reducing energy costs and commuters' gasoline expenses. From now onwards, government employees in Utah will try to accomplish nothing in only 4 days per week.

A man in Kentucky paid for sexual favors with a $100 gas card. Nowadays that is the only way to go all-around-the-world with a $100 gas card.

Tomatoes
The U.S. Food and Drug Administration Saturday revealed that jalapeño peppers are responsible for the salmonella outbreak and not tomatoes like it was first believed. Unfortunately, there’s no chance the Bush administration will release the tomatoes they had already sent to Guantanamo.

Coins
Officials have unveiled the prototype of the first U.S. coin with readable Braille characters. It reads: this is worth sh...

Officials have unveiled the prototype of the first U.S. coin with readable Braille characters. Blind people as a reference were using only the laughter of the Europeans every time they tried to pay with one of those US coins.

Pregnant Man
The so-called "pregnant man," gave birth Sunday to a healthy baby girl. The baby was all 7 lbs. of future conflicts and emotional scars.

The so-called "pregnant man," gave birth Sunday to a healthy baby girl. The delivery took long, after pushing for a couple of seconds he requested some beer, pizza and the football game on TV.

McCain
ABC News has learned that the McCain campaign has hired Mike DuHaime, former Giuliani’s campaign manager, as political director. The changes didn’t wait, especially when McCain announced he’ll make some changes Sunday at 9:11 PM.

Wax
A man tore the head from a controversial waxwork figure of Adolf Hitler on the opening day of Berlin's Madame Tussauds museum on Saturday. Later, Mel Gibson apologized and said he just wanted a souvenir.

Bozo
Larry Harmon, better known as Bozo the Clown, died Thursday of congestive heart failure. Fortunately, he left an active legacy in all the members of congress.