August 6th 2008

McCain
In a recently released video, Paris Hilton rebutted the McCain commercial that used her picture. Paris Hilton’s response made her relevant again. Today Eddie Murphy, Tara Reid and all the former American Idol contestants called the McCain campaign and begged for a spot in their next commercial.

Political analysts believe the confrontation between McCain and Paris Hilton could benefit the candidate in the polls. If McCain single-handedly revived Paris Hilton's sagging career, he can definitely do the same with the sagging economy.

John McCain volunteered his wife for a topless beauty pageant while campaigning in Sturgis, South Dakota. Maybe now McCain sees the importance of inflating the tires properly.

The confrontation between Senator John McCain and Paris Hilton has become one of the most discussed items of the day. "I’m enjoying my 15 minutes of fame," said John McCain.

Freeman
Morgan Freeman was involved in a serious car accident in Mississippi. He was driving a 1997 Nissan Maxima. Apparently, Wayne Enterprises pays crap!

Exams
A new study concludes that men over 75 should stop getting prostate exams because they cause more harm than good, especially for the doctor that does it.

Giggles
A 20-year-old student from Barrow upon Soar, Leicestershire, has cataplexy and could be paralyzed if she gets a fit of the giggles. There go my chances of getting naked in front of her.

Bills
Research shows that American paper money contains the highest traces of cocaine. Why do you think Europeans still accept our devalued money?

Beatles
A newly discovered tape of The Beatles laughing and chatting during an early recording session has sold for about $23,000, an auction house reported Tuesday. It’s easy to spot Ringo, he is the one laughing out of tempo.