November 13th 2008

McCain
The National Enquirer says that John McCain's wife Cindy McCain, was seen several times "passionately kissing and hugging another man." McCain has a suspect, because since September none of their houses has had a problem with a clogged toilet.

The National Enquirer says that John McCain's wife, Cindy McCain, was seen several times "passionately kissing and hugging another man." A lesson to be learned... So much caring about who Obama palls around with, McCain forgot to check who his wife did.

Senator John McCain visited the Tonight Show with Jay Leno. Things got out of control when McCain walked on the set and started yelling at Kevin Eubanks thinking he was Obama.

Obama
The Democratic Party in Kansas wants to make November 4 a national holiday to remember the historic election that Obama just won. But later they were reminded that Obama already has a holiday: Christmas.

It was reported in the media that Michelle Obama’s election-night earrings cost a reported $11,000. She didn’t spend much though; Hillary is desperate for money and sold them to her for half the price.

It was reported in the media that Michelle Obama’s election-night earrings cost a reported $11,000. She didn’t spend much though; she changed those earrings for two tickets to attend inauguration day.

Disney has invited Barack Obama’s daughters to visit Hannah Montana. Obama can’t say no, they owe Disney; after all, even Mickey Mouse voted for him.

Foley
Mark Foley talked to the press and said that he is not a pedophile because his lurid chats were with 17-year-olds, just months from being men. To what Larry Craig said: “I can’t wait they become men, I can’t wait!”

In the news
A Canadian teen that ran away after his parents confiscated his Xbox was found dead. Apparently, in real life, prostitutes don’t enjoy being punched like in Grand Theft Auto.

Saudi Arabia recently hosted its first ever beauty pageant for sheep. And like in any other beauty pageant, the winner was the one that slept with the judges.

Canadian prison authorities were forced to release a 450-pound drug gang member this week because he was too large for his cell. Immediately after he was set free, prison guards noticed the absence of 20 inmates who apparently were smuggled out of prison hiding up his ass.

The United States may be on course to lose its 'AAA' rating due to the large amount of debt it has accumulated. Judging by the latest government’s decisions the new rate given to the states will be AA!

Vice President Dick Cheney and his wife invited the future vice presidential couple to their residence at the Naval Observatory. And today Biden was spotted buying a house-warming gift for Cheney: a basket full of roasted puppies.