November 17th 2008

Lohan
Animal activist in Paris dumped a bag of flour over Lindsay Lohan for wearing a fur stole. Activists dumped more flour over Lindsay Lohan later on when she got out of the car, but had to apologize because that wasn’t fur.

Animal activist in Paris dumped a bag of flour over Lindsay Lohan for wearing a fur stole. There are no pictures of the incident because she mistakenly snorted the flour.

Bush
On Wednesday, the "Most Beautiful Bottom" competition took place in Paris, France. President Bush said he had chances to win, because he hears lots of people telling him "What an ass!"

The president of China will visit Cuba soon. And if some Democrats have it their way, so will Bush, but just Guantanamo.

Economy
World leaders who gathered last week in Washington, D.C., enjoyed expensive wine and food, even though their agenda was to discuss the global economic crisis. I just don't want to be there when they discuss the AIDS pandemic.

Obama
According to international newspapers, Obama’s victory made it cool to say you’re an American again when you travel to Europe. Not everyone is enjoying this; the Canadian backpack industry is filing for bankruptcy.

President-elect Barack Obama met with McCain this Monday. These are signs Obama rubbed its victory on McCain’s face....

1. Obama called McCain to schedule the meeting at 3 am.

2. Obama sent his presidential plane to pick up McCain: The Air Force THAT ONE

3. Obama made McCain wait in the lobby because he was having a meeting with Bill Ayers.

4. Right before the meeting, Obama cancelled it to fix the economy.

The media is concerned because if Obama’s administration is like his tight-lipped and disciplined campaign, there won’t be any leaks. Unlike a McCain’s presidency, that would have guaranteed a lot of leaking.

TRL
"Total Request Live," the after-school snack for a generation of MTV viewers, has filmed its final episode on Sunday. Making it the first time they followed a viewers’ request which was “please, cancel the show...”

Palin
Sarah Palin continues to be a controversial figure in the GOP. Half of the party wants her to shut her mouth, the other half, her legs…

Some people say that Sara Palin’s answers to reporters don’t make much sense; Sarah Palin’s sentences are like a bridge to nowhere.

The number of suicides has increased in the US: mostly people affected by the bad economy, and those who‘ve done close caption during Sarah Palin’s interviews and speeches.

In the news
Authorities say an 11-year-old boy hit his mother in the head with a saw and then offered her $5 not to call police. His father was mad. “Didn’t I tell you the $5 bucks offer wasn’t for your mom but to the cops?” he said.

Good news, the U.S. smoking rate has dropped below 20% for the first time. Bad news: to calm down their nerves people now shoot each other.

Thomas Beatie, better known as the "pregnant man," is pregnant again. And you know that the baby will definitely choose baby formula.

Madonna thinks that Alex Rodriguez has the heart of a poet. So do Yankees fans, because during the play offs, A-Rod seems to be holding a pen instead of a bat.

Mexico City is giving out free Viagra and other impotence drugs to men 70 and older. And today Lou Dobbs started handing out free condoms…