July 24th 2009

Conservatives are criticizing President Obama's pick for the next Surgeon General saying that she's obese. That was a chance Obama had to be bipartisan, because if it was for obese people, the Republicans have a lot of that.

President Obama is catching some slack because his pick for Surgeon General is overweight. It seems Bill Clinton continues putting his favorite people inside the Obama administration.

Gidget, the Chihuahua from the Taco Bell commercials, has died. Michael Vick was just set free…. Coincidence?

Gidget, the Chihuahua from the Taco Bell commercials, has died. Her wish will be honored, she’ll be cremated and her ashes spread in every chalupa served on Taco Bell today.

One in three 85-year-olds are still sexually active. The other two will also get stiff soon though.

One in three 85-year-olds are still sexually active. It’s true; my grandpa still chases my grandma to have sex all the time. The problem is that when he catches her, he doesn’t remember why he was chasing her.

Doctors in Romania removed two hammers from a guy’s butt that he had shoved to relieve his constipation. His neighbor immediately told him to keep those tools.

According to a new survey from New York University, two in five doctors admit they have a, quote, "negative reaction" to obese patients, especially doctors who have lost wrist watches during rectal exams.

Billy Joel is dating again. He’s not going to get married, but he is likely to “crash” a wedding.