October 19th 2009

Balloon boy’s father confessed Sunday it was all a hoax to land a reality TV show. Lucky son of a gun; he got one... he'll be on Cops!

It was revealed yesterday that the parents of balloon boy met in a Hollywood acting school. At least they are going to have some help to pay the bond when they demand the money back from those classes.

The family of Falcon, the balloon boy, had already been part of a TV show called Wife Swap. The kid hid for hours, farted and puked on national TV; I think the family would have done better in the TV show Supernanny.

Falcon, the balloon boy, ratted his dad out on National TV when he said “We did this for the show” I think every politician should be forced to have a Falcon next to him. “We didn’t know they didn’t have WMD…” Falcon: “we did this for the show…”

The father of balloon boy told reporters that were gathering outside his house to leave questions in a cardboard box on the front doorstep. Imagine the surprise of the reporters when they opened the box and balloon boy was hiding inside.

TARGET is catching some slack for selling an illegal alien costume for Halloween. The outfit is so realistic; Wal-Mart has already hired 20 people that were trying it out.

TARGET is selling an illegal alien costume for Halloween. It is a rip-off; you can rent a real illegal for half the price.

President Obama proposed giving seniors a check for two hundred fifty dollars… so they can have a great last meal before the death panels arrive!

A woman left with a 10-minute memory after a series of medical mistakes has won $7 million in a compensation package. And 11 minutes later the husband congratulated her for winning $1 million.

A woman left with a 10-minute memory after a series of medical mistakes has won $7 million in a compensation package. Unfortunately for the woman, doctors told her they had already paid her 11 minutes ago.

A study says that driving convertible cars is bad for a person's hearing. Awesome, so all those old guys who feel cool driving convertible won’t hear young girls mocking them.

A study says that poor vision can be tied to a shorter lifespan, especially if you drive without your glasses.

A Ford Motor Co. employee has been charged with stealing its trade secrets for the Chinese. And now China knows how NOT to do cars.

The Mexican capital is putting 1,300 police officers on a diet. So now you know, next time you get in trouble in Mexico, the easiest way to bribe them is with food.

A woman in England has been diagnosed with one of Britain's loudest snores after being found to make more noise than a jet aircraft during her sleep. We tried to talk to her husband but unfortunately we didn’t have anybody to interpret sign language in our staff.

Anheuser-Busch was the exclusive advertiser during SNL on Saturday to promote a new beer. They sold tons, because only drunk you can able to put up with this season of SNL.

Things continue to deflate for the balloon boy’s father. Colorado police may charge the family for perpetrating a hoax. And now Pixar wants to sue them for copyright infringement for stealing the idea from the movie UP.

The mayor of Moscow promised a winter without snow this year. He is going to get lambasted by Fox News for believing in global warming

The mayor of Moscow will use the Air Force and some chemical elements to have a winter without snow in Moscow. Russians say it’ll be interesting to see Santa in Speedos this year.

An all-male college in Atlanta, Georgia, is cracking down on cross-dressing students. Good luck next year trying to get donations from Eddie Murphy.