December 11th 2009

Tiger Woods' mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital yesterday .And if you thought Tiger was a hero to all the men out there for having affairs with tons of hot women, now that he almost killed his mother-in-law, his status was elevated to almost God.

Tiger Woods' mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital yesterday after she complained of stomach pains. Apparently, she and her daughter went out to dinner on Monday night so now all the waitresses at the restaurant are main suspects for food poisoning.

Tiger Woods' mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital yesterday. Don’t tell me Tiger tried to go COUGAR!

Tiger Woods' mother-in-law was admitted to the hospital yesterday. Tiger visited her at the hospital and left satisfied, because she was fine, and also because he got the phone numbers of every female nurse there.

Prostitutes in Copenhagen are offering free sex to the climate-change delegates. How many Republicans do you think are going to start believing in global warming just to take advantage of this offer?

A newspaper in China said that a Chinese man signed a contract that allows his wife to beat him up once a week. Only once a week? Where do I sign said Tiger.

A Florida woman is facing a felony domestic abuse charge for allegedly striking her boyfriend several times in the head with a raw steak. Apparently, she had a beef with him.

A Florida woman is facing a felony domestic abuse charge for allegedly striking her boyfriend several times in the head with a raw steak. Her defense is not going to work; she claims she was just tenderizing it for him.

Someone threw 2 tomatoes at Sarah Palin during a book signing. Fortunately, the person missed twice… unfortunately for the Cubs, he’ll be released in time for next season.

Low temperatures are affecting almost the entire country. It's Polanski cold out there... in the teens

It is so cold, even Tiger Woods would rather sleep inside the house with his mad wife and mother-in-law.

It is so cold, Tiger Woods’ wife said she wants to burn some wood.

It is so cold even Kirstie Alley is refusing to open the refrigerator.

It is so cold Britney is wearing underwear.