March 12th 2007

Daylight Saving
This Sunday morning Americans had to move their clocks forward 1 hour. Rapper Flavor Flav has not finished yet.

Due to Daylight-saving, this past Sunday only had 23 hours thus only 23 new people launch their candidacy for president of the U.S.

Vegas Debate
Democratic presidential candidate John Edwards is refusing to participate in a debate broadcast on the FOX News Channel because the channel is known for its conservative bias. Fox President Roger Ailes said he doesn’t understand the former Senator because Fox was willing to treat Edwards “Fairy and Balanced”

Nevada democrats are pulling out of a Fox News co-sponsored debate that was set to take place in August. Fox President Roger Ailes said that the party’s decision of pulling out of the debate emboldens the terrorists like Keith Olberman.

Osama
Osama Bin Laden turned 50 last Saturday. Apparently he did not get many presents; most of them were sent to Obama by mistake

Osama Bin Laden turned 50 last Saturday. He had a big cake and blew 50 suicide bombers.

Osama Bin Laden turned 50 last Saturday. He was registered at Target.

Giuliani
Some conservatives believe a 1989 video of Rudy Giuliani asking for public funding to support abortion might hurt his presidential aspiration. Asked by reporters during a fundraiser, Giuliani said that is not fair to be judged by an old video and then continued showing the tapes of 9/11.

Honesty
A new Associated Press-Ipsos poll says 55 percent of those surveyed consider honesty, integrity and other values of character the most important qualities they look for in a presidential candidate. The other 45 percent are running for office.

James Brown
James Brown, who died in Atlanta at the age of 73, was laid to rest this Saturday at the age of 75.

Legendary singer James Brown, who died on Christmas day, finally was laid to rest Saturday. Just like the grandma’s present that you get for Xmas and bury a couple of months later.

Surgery
Last year, Americans had almost 11.5 million cosmetic procedures and that was only between Nancy Pelosi and Kenny Rogers.

Global Warming
Global warming experts say that in a couple of decades, millions of people won't have enough water. I guess we will have to drink our vodka without ice then.