July 24th 2007

CNN/YouTube
Before the first ever CNN/YouTube presidential debate, Democratic candidates where asked which their favorite YouTube video was. Most of them said "Dick in a Box" but just because they thought it was a video of Dick Cheney in a coffin.

During the CNN/YouTube debate, presidential candidate Obama was asked if he was black enough, to what he said every time he is catching a cab in Manhattan he feels black. Until of course the cab driver finds out his middle name is Hussein and in that case he is invited to drive the taxi.

On the night of the first ever CNN/YouTube presidential debate millions of people gathered in front of their computers to access the Youtube site. Unfortunately it was not see the debate but rather the Drama Prairie Dog or the Chocolate Rain videos.

The first-ever CNN/YouTube debate started with the video from a voter named Zach who greeted everyone by saying "What’s Up?" It was sad to hear Joe Biden trying to sound hip and young when he answered "My penis…"

Alberto Gonzales
Alberto Gonzales returns today to the Senate Judiciary Committee to answer tough questions about his credibility as an Attorney General. Democrats promised to drill Alberto Gonzales, so much so that it is possible that they might find some of the lawyers he fired together with some polyps inside of him.

Compliment Machine
An artist from Washington DC invented a compliment machine that dishes out random compliments to passers-by along 14th Street in the US capital. Congressmen are considering the installation of the machine in congress because they wouldn’t need to hire a prostitute to say nice things to them, thus saving money and their careers.

African Language
A man accused of molesting a kid is no longer facing charges because the court took too long to find an interpreter fluent in his native African Tribal language called Vai. In other news the interest in learning this tribal language has increased dramatically, unfortunately not from people interested in interpreting, but rather priests that want to avoid future convictions.