September 12th 2007

Russian Bomb
According to Russian authorities, Russia has tested Tuesday the most powerful bomb ever made. American officials argued that statement and said the biggest bomb ever made was tested Sunday at the MTV Video Awards.

Osama Video
Osama Bin Laden released a new video this Tuesday. He didn’t discard a new attack to America, but not probably using airplanes, because last time he sent al-Qaeda members to highjack some planes they were screwed by a US senator in the bathroom at the airport.

Osama bin Laden appeared on another video this Tuesday with a more youthful look, with his beard and hair dyed dark brown, and a suiting white robe. Experts believe this is a clear sign Osama is undergoing a middle age crisis, especially because in the video you can see his new sporty three-hump camel parked in the back.

David Petraeus
A big part of the media believes that Gen. David Petraeus' testimony this week on Capitol Hill was written by members of the White House. Apparently the speech had only 2-syllable words, it includes the word “hard” every other word and has the phonetic pronunciation of the word "Nuclear."

The top U.S. commander in Iraq Gen. David Petraeus came under fire on Tuesday by Democrats and some Republicans. Fortunately for him, and unlike some of his soldiers in Iraq, he was wearing a helmet and body armor.

Larry Craig
Senator Larry Craig filed papers to drop his guilty plea in the bathroom sex sting. Apparently the papers were filed in a soft roll of 176 Sq. Ft.

Tangerine
Tangerine peel could help in the fight against certain cancers, researchers said on Wednesday. Cigarette companies said from now onwards they will wrap up their tobacco in tangerine peel.

Syndicated columnists
A recent study shows that conservative syndicated columnists get more space than their progressive counterparts in American Newspapers. Obviously you need more space and millions of words to try to explain what the Bush administration is doing.

Wiretapping
Republican Senator Kit Bond said Monday that he wants to expand the law to allow monitoring of all types of communications including telephone conversations, e-mails and foot tapping in restrooms.