October 25th 2007

Phenomenon
NBC last night debuted "Phenomenon," a TV show where 10 aspirants competing to become the world's "next great mentalist." The show already has a winner: The one that predicted this show is going to be cancelled soon.

Names
According to a new survey by Zogby, more than 20% of Americans say they would change their name for $100,000, especially if your name is Muhammad and you travel a lot.

According to a new survey by Zogby, more than 20% of Americans say they would change their name for $100,000. Republican presidential candidates would pay that amount or more to have their names changed to Ronald Reagan.

Condoleezza
A woman with her hands painted blood-red confronted Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice at the US Congress Wednesday, shouting "war criminal" before being hauled away by Bill Maher.

Obama
Democratic presidential hopeful Barack Obama has nabbed the backing of Duffy Lyon, a farmer famous for sculpting cows out of butter at the Iowa State Fair. After hearing of a sweet, buttery 600 pounds cow, Bill Clinton said he’s voting for Obama.

Democratic presidential hopeful Barack Obama has nabbed the backing of Duffy Lyon, a farmer famous for sculpting cows out of butter at the Iowa State Fair. Republicans are now desperate to get the endorsement of Chocolate Jesus.

Wrong Reasons
A new study on marriage finds that too many Americans are getting married for the wrong reasons: Jack Daniels and Jose Cuervo.

A new study on marriage finds that too many Americans are getting married for the wrong reasons. Let me introduce them to you: My son "Broken Trojan" and my daughter "don’t worry is that day of the month."

Michael Brown
Former FEMA Michael Brown is being offered to the media as available for interviews to discuss the wildfire crisis in Southern California. Because, if there’s someone that knows about disaster, that is Brown, not so much about how to deal with it, but more like how to foster it.

Former FEMA Michael Brown is being offered to the media as available for interviews to discuss the wildfire crisis in Southern California. Unfortunately he tends to be late for the interviews.

Giuliani
During a town hall meeting in northwestern New Hampshire Tuesday night, Rudy Giuliani said that blind people should be able to carry guns. He also said that he wouldn’t mind if Mohels and hairdressers are blind either.

During a town hall meeting in northwestern New Hampshire Tuesday night, Rudy Giuliani said that blind people should be able to carry guns. Maybe Giuliani is planning to hire them to guard the constitution if he becomes president.