November 19th 2007

Pope
Pope Benedict XVI will visit the White House on his first U.S. papal trip next spring, church officials announced Monday. The pope could spend up to 8 years in the country depending on whether or not he’s confessing Dick Cheney.

Al Gore
Former US vice president Al Gore will visit the Oval Office on November 26 when US President George W. Bush honors US Nobel Prize winners, a Bush spokesman said Friday. The spokesman also disclosed that they had to tell Gore to not knock at the door 10 times and scream for hours like he used to to warn Bill Clinton he was going to enter the oval office.

Iraq
According to an analysis by Oxfam International last summer, the percentage of Iraqis without access to decent water supplies has risen from 50 percent to 70 percent since the start of the U.S.-led war. To make matters worse the only water Iraqis are getting is "Blackwaters."

Britney
After being told that Britney Spears ran a red light with her young sons in the car, a judge ruled Friday that the pop star may no longer drive with the children. After hearing the news, the Orthopedist American association announced they might loose millions of dollars after the judge’s decision.

Lottery
China has set up its first help center for lottery addicts, that offers counseling and legal assistance, the Beijing Morning Post said Friday. Unfortunately, the phone number of the lottery help center was the most played number this week in the Chinese lottery.

China has set up its first help center for lottery addicts, that offers counseling and legal assistance, the Beijing Morning Post said Friday. Apparently gambling addiction has increased dramatically in China, with people mostly betting on which products do not contain lead.

Cameras
Florida is exploring the idea of installing "talking" cameras at several of the public beaches to ward off or catch people engaged in public sex. They are still forced to keep some security officers, because the cameras will only encourage Paris Hilton.

Toys
It was reported in the news that due to the recalls of Chinese-made toys in the United States, there’s a big surge in demand for the hand-crafted, all-American wooden toys. The toys are not hazardous and useful. Right after Christmas and when the kids are playing videogames in the computers, their parents can use the wooden toys to fuel the living-room fire.

McCain
Presidential candidate John McCain said on the campaign trail that if he’s elected president he won’t need secret service protection. On the other hand, Hillary said she will double her security: secret service to protect her, and secret service to prevent Bill from having an affair.