June 18th 2008

Gore
According to the Tennessee Center for Policy Research, in the year since Al Gore took steps to make his home more energy-efficient, the former Vice President’s home energy use surged more than 10%, obviously, not for the use of his treadmill.

Al Gore has decided to endorse Barack Obama for president Monday. That created a new serious problem in the Obama campaign, not because of new attacks from the right, but it’ll be hard to find a stage big enough to accommodate Al Gore and Oprah together.

According to the Tennessee Center for Policy Research, in the year since Al Gore took steps to make his home more energy-efficient, the former Vice President’s home energy use surged more than 10%. Apparently, he‘s got a spotlight on every award he’s won in the last couple of years.

Presidential candidates
Presidential candidates are asking for a clean campaign. Obama doesn’t want to be called Muslim, McCain doesn’t want to be called old, and Nader is begging everybody to call him...

Republicans in Texas distributed a pin at the state convention that said: “If Obama is president will we still call it the White House?” Apparently, Democrats are working on another pin that says: “If McCain is president, will the White House be called ‘The Retirement Home’?”

Gas
According to UPS officials, the drivers of the company have been instructed to take mostly right turns to save money on gas. It is arguable though, our country has taken a right turn for the last 7 years and we have lost a lot of money...

Weight
A man has lost 79 lbs since December by only eating McDonalds. Actually, he had put on 200 lbs until recently when he started ordering extra tomatoes in his burgers.

Coffee
According to a new study out of Spain, drinking coffee can lower your risk of dying from heart attack, unless you go to Starbucks for the first time and they tell you it’s gonna be $5 for the cup.

Brains
Scientists say that losing just one night's sleep can cause the brain to spontaneously shut down. Good thing to know Dick Cheney is safe, because he doesn’t lose sleep for anything.

Scientists say that losing just one night's sleep can cause the brain to spontaneously shut down. How lucky is Bush, he can play poker three nights in a row if he wants, because there’s not much to shut down anyways.

Dogs
Mayor James Valley of Helena-West Helena ordered the release of 10 dogs into the forest Wednesday. We finally know “who let the dogs out...”

Paper
According to environmental groups, you can now buy paper products that are made from elephant dung, like the Washington Post.

Celebrities
Heidi Klum let paparazzo’s take pictures of her right forearm where she tattooed her husband’s name Seal. Seal though, wouldn’t let the media see the place where he tattooed her wife’s name, the name of every member of her family and the name of the members of the town where she was born, because it was very private.

Weddings
You know how the judges in California find out who's the man in the gay couples they marry?
They toss a remote control and whoever grabs it is the man in the relationship