October 9th 2008

Palin
The 20-year-old who hacked Sarah Palin's e-mail account has been indicted by a federal grand jury. The judge let him stay out of jail as long as he stays anywhere without a computer. Ironically, the only place in the US without computers is McCain’s home.

Did you notice that Sarah Palin never wears pants, only skirts? Apparently, all her pants are burned, because “liar, liar, pants on fire...”

Economy
According to the New York Post, New York-based brokers, analysts, and finance executives who are suddenly looking for new jobs are having facelifts. Apparently, they discovered that restaurants only hire young waiters.

Biden
At an Obama campaign event in Tampa, Florida, Joe Biden was introduced as Senator John McCain. And Biden immediately sued his plastic surgeon.

Debate
Political analysts said that during the debate, both candidates were not clear and almost incomprehensible when talking about matters people care about. So much so, even Tom Brokaw was more understandable.

In the news
A Canadian man who missed the deadline to play the lottery by 7 seconds, had chosen the winning ticket and missed the chance to pocket $27 million in the Canadian lottery. In other news, a wife was brutally murdered for taking some time to decide which shoes to wear before going to a store to play the lottery with her husband.

A German man had a double arm transplant after losing his limbs six years ago. Everybody was in tears, especially his buddy Mike, the one responsible all these years for holding it for him when going to the bathroom.