March 20th 2009

Congress passed a bill that would impose a 90 percent income tax on $165 million in bonuses distributed to executives of AIG. Does it mean we don’t get to lynch them now? Darn!

Congress passed a bill that would impose a 90 percent income tax on $165 million in bonuses distributed to executives of AIG. Did you hear that? We’re coming for you now, Octomom!


Former New York governor Eliot Spitzer is back in front of the TV cameras to talk about the AIG scandal. It is very appropriate, if you think about it. Who is better to talk about screwing people than Eliot Spitzer.

During his appearance with Jay Leno, Obama made a risky joke about Special Olympics when he talked about bowling. And today he apologized to the members of congress in case trhey felt offended.

A woman's dog in North Carolina, ate $400 in cash that she was about to deposit into her bank account. The government should enforce people to feed their dogs with some money, because nobody will leave their crap hanging on the streets if they know their dogs might poop it back.

A woman in Aliso Viejo, California, started throwing dog poop when people asked her to stop giving her dog an enema at the mall. I know ShamWow is a great product, but aren’t they getting out of control with these wacky mall demonstrations?

A woman in Aliso Viejo, California, started throwing dog poop when people asked her to stop giving her dog an enema at the mall. Don’t tell me her dog also ate her money...

Alex Rodriguez posed shirtless and kissing himself in the mirror in a magazine layout. Remember when baseball was tough? The only time you would hear about baseball players and mirrors was when they were snorting cocaine.

A Swedish woman spent over $400,000 on a plastic spray bottle filled with holy water that ended up being fake. Experts confirmed the Holy Water was bogus after they offered Dick Cheney a sip and he didn't burn.

First lady Michelle Obama is planting a new garden near the fountain on the South Lawn. I don’t know what they are going to grow, but to give you a clue, reporters saw Snoop Doggy Dog entering the White House.

First lady Michelle Obama is planting a new garden near the fountain on the South Lawn. And today she received tons of watermelon seeds from the former mayor of Los Alamitos in Southern California.

According to IMS Health Inc, the sales of prescription drugs rose the slowest in the U.S. in at least 47 years. It is hard for Rush to buy his drugs now; he is constantly on the spotlight.

According to IMS Health Inc, the sales of prescription drugs rose the slowest in the U.S. in at least 47 years. You can blame the tough economy, and also the fact that people don’t need to buy pills to sleep anymore; they can just watch “The Apprentice.”