April17th 2009

Friday Leftovers! Tons of jokes for a Friday....shoot me an e-mail with ideas, suggestions or just to say hi... pedrobartes@hotmail.com
have a nice weekend...
Pedro

President Obama sat with Mexican president Felipe Calderon yesterday. Obama brought an i-Pod again, not to give it to the Mexican president, just to ask him if he could load it with illegal music.

President Obama is in Mexico these days. Apparently, once and for all, he wants a good fake birth certificate that he can show to the Republicans.

The White House asked Georgetown University to cover up a symbol of Jesus Christ before President Obama spoke there this week. So the University covered all the mirrors.

Hillary Clinton is trying to raise money and pay her campaign debts by raffling off a day with her husband Bill. And today Bill bought all the tickets and was spotted giving them away for free at a Jenny Craig meeting.

Hillary Clinton is trying to raise money and pay her campaign debts by raffling off a day with her husband Bill. Rumors are Hillary rigged it so Susan Boyle can win the date with Bill.

The city of Oslo, Norway, is about to start using city buses that run on human waste. We should follow that example, with all the crap produced by congress we can afford having Hummers for every citizen living in this country.

A British mother spent $15,000 on plastic surgery to look exactly like her younger daughter. That is not as creepy as the fact that the daughter’s dad asked her to do that…

A British mother spent $15,000 on plastic surgery to look exactly like her younger daughter. The worst part, the daughter was Susan Boyle…

A man from Brooklyn bit off the tip of his own penis, police told a local newspaper. Unfortunately, he went from being the envy of all his friends to not so much…

A man from Brooklyn bit off the tip of his own penis, police told a local newspaper. How bad is the economy that we are now forced to self-circumcise?

A man has been arrested in Spain for using veterinary instruments to perform breast implants on patients in his squalid home. Women complained because when they asked for breast augmentation they would leave the room with eight boobs.

A 28-year-old man has been sentenced to three weeks in jail for urinating on a 66-year-old woman during a Continental Airlines flight last month. His defense was stupid; he claimed he thought it was IN-continental Airlines.

NBC confirmed yesterday it wants Rod Blagojevich to appear on a reality TV show called "I'm a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here!" So far they have two contestants: Rod Blagojevich and Phil Spector and get me out of here means jail

Eddie Van Halen is now offering the new EVH Brand Signature Striped Sneakers. Unfortunately the sneakers come without a tongue.