May 13th 2009

Donald Trump decided to let Miss California USA keep her crown. He even tried to help her make amends with the gay community by suggesting gays would love if she experiments with his wife.

Donald Trump decided to let Miss California USA keep her crown. But don’t you need a head to hold a crown?

The Miss California USA controversy is generating a new interest in the Miss America Beauty pageants. Donald Trump is loving this controversy so much that future judges’ questions will include abortion, Israel-Palestine conflict and Rush Limbaugh.

Donald Trump decided to let Miss California USA, Carrie Prejean, retain her crown. Isn’t it ironic that Miss California probably practiced all her life to wish for World Peace during the beauty pageants and she ended up causing such a war between her and those in favor of gay marriage?

According to new figures from a UK police group, coke prices are up. Things are so bad for coke addicts that now Amy Winehouse is cutting her cocaine with a Costco card and snorting it with one peso bills.

Shirley Jones, who was so wholesome on "The Partridge Family," might pose nude for Playboy at the age of 75. And that will be the first day I won’t be lying to my wife when I tell her I buy the magazine for the articles.

According to a new study from the University of Maryland Medical Center, listening to music you don't like can have a negative effect on your health. And today Rush Limbaugh sent Wanda Sykes a CD of Paris Hilton.

Paula Abdul has decided to give Scott Macintyre, this year's blind "American Idol" finalist, a guide dog. I don’t think she was happy with the dog he got her though: a drug-sniffing-dog.

According to a new study men are 40% less fertile than they were ten years ago. Awesome! It means Octomom has 40% less chances to get pregnant again.

According to HarperCollins, Sarah Palin’s new book will come out in spring of 2010. Rumors are, the name of the book is "101 Moose Recipes...”

Hotels on Mexico's Caribbean coast on Tuesday offered free vacations for three years to any tourist catching swine flu while on holiday there. Still no news of free days if you catch an STD or diarrhea.

Hotels on Mexico's Caribbean coast on Tuesday offered free vacations for three years to any tourist catching swine flu while on holiday there. It is a great idea; you’ll never see American tourists being so friendly with Hotel staff, hugging and kissing them just to see if they can catch the swine flu.

Octomom, Nadya Suleman, admitted that the surgery she underwent yesterday will actually make it EASIER for her to conceive. Apparently, the surgery consisted of breast implants, tummy tuck and more lips.

Japan is selling a new product called the Angels Knee Pillow which is basically a bench for men to kneel on while they go number one. Which is also great because you can use the kneeling to thank God it didn’t burn this time.