August 19th 2009

Michael Jackson will be buried on August 29th. It’s been more than two months since he died, but the body still looks the same, plastic takes a long time to decompose.

Celine Dion is pregnant… shushing those nasty rumors that the belly was because she had eaten something.

Florida has experienced its first population drop since 1946… but just because Cubans come to America only to change the old cars for new ones and the return.

A New York artist compiled an album featuring nothing but screams. Or you can just save all the money and watch The View.

A New York artist compiled an album featuring nothing but screams. He recorded it from a couple of Town Hall meetings.

Brett Favre has signed with the Minnesota Vikings in a $10 million deal. That on top of the $4500 he gets for being a clunker.

A town hall protester showed up at a meeting with a gun and a T-shirt that read “it’s time to water the tree of Liberty”. Ironically, the guy was planted.

A South Carolina woman was awarded $2 million after her dentist accidentally removed all 16 of her upper teeth. Apparently, the dentist wanted her to fit in South Carolina.

A South Carolina woman was awarded $2 million after her dentist accidentally removed all 16 of her upper teeth. Now she looks like everybody else in South Carolina but rich.

Hillary Clinton said Tuesday that information her husband brought back from North Korea has been "extremely helpful…” if you want to know where strip joints are located in North Korea.

According to scientists, men who snore loudly may have a shorter life expectancy than those who sleep quietly, usually because their wives smother them with a pillow.

GM said on Tuesday it is increasing production in the US after a surge in sales ignited by the "Cash for Clunkers" incentives program. They say they are committed to making more clunkers.

A recent study proved cockroaches might survive in case of severe climate change. Now we know why some politicians ignore the warning of the environmentalists; they will survive anyway.

More and more women are undergoing genital cosmetic surgeries... but just because they have had so much plastic surgery, after a while, when they do their faces they inevitably have to do their genitals.

Four of the rides from Michael Jackson’s Neverland Ranch will be featured at the California State Fair. And like when Michael was alive, you have to be “this short” to ride Michael Jackson.

Kelly Clarkson might return to "idol" as a guest judge. She fits perfectly as a replacement, not for Paula, but for Randy.