November 20th 2009

President Obama sat down for an interview with Major Garrett on Fox News last night. I know Obama declared he was at war with Fox News, but to send a Major? Isn’t that too much?

Obama continues to get some slack from conservatives for bowing to the Japanese emperor. Obama is getting concerned about it; he is now so afraid of an opportunistic picture that he’s been doing his entire China tour with his shoelaces untied because he doesn’t dare bend to tie them anymore.

President Obama admitted that he has never twitted. And a confused McCain said today “I didn’t know Malia and Sasha were adopted!”

Jenna Jameson appeared on "Oprah" yesterday. The audience went wild when at the end of the show Oprah pointed at them and started screaming: “and you got STD, and you got STD and you got STD!”

Sarah Palin has been doing a series of interviews to promote her book. I don’t want to say the interviews have consisted only of softball questions, but the only chance you get to see Palin being nailed is if you buy the porn movie “Nailing Palin.”

Sarah Palin is calling the "Newsweek" cover photo of her in jogging shorts "sexist." While Bill Clinton calls it “Hide-it-from-Hillary” material.

An airline in Finland is offering a promotion that allows frequent flyers to cash in their miles for a boob job. I wish they would do the same with Northwest Airlines, because with all the overshooting airports, my wife’s boobs would be as big as Dolly Parton’s.

A drug that failed tests as an antidepressant is being hailed by doctors as the first women's Viagra. Unfortunately, women will continue to get depressed, especially after they did it with their inadequate husbands.

A drug that failed tests as an antidepressant is being hailed by doctors as the first women's Viagra. And if they do it with someone younger, their depression disappears as well.

A drug that failed tests as an antidepressant is being hailed by doctors as the first women's Viagra. Come on, there’s already a drug that helps increase women’s libido. It is called “wine.”

According to a new study, 40 percent of Americans will be obese by 2018. Does that mean that the other 50 percent of obese people will start dieting?

According to a government report, 49 million of Americans are having trouble getting enough to eat. With so many people going hungry, why don’t we do a show like The Biggest Loser, but the opposite, where we feed people?

According to a government report, 49 millions of Americans are having trouble getting enough to eat. No wonder Tyra Banks doesn’t have any problems getting models for her almost 20 seasons of America’s Next Top Model.