March 15th 2010

The New York Post says that Tiger Woods has hired former George W. Bush adviser and spokesman Ari Fleischer to help with his return to golf. This guy is familiar with Tiger’s situation he helped Bush and the former president screwed millions!

The New York Post says that Tiger Woods has hired former George W. Bush adviser and spokesman Ari Fleischer to help him rehabilitate his public image. And today Tiger admitted to have had sex with several females but just because they had weapons of mass destruction.

A Mississippi school canceled its prom after a lesbian student petitioned to bring her girlfriend and to wear a tuxedo. Schools officials in Mississippi were outraged, not so much because the date was another woman, but because she wasn’t a relative.

A Mississippi school canceled its prom after a lesbian student petitioned to bring her girlfriend and to wear a tuxedo. Schools officials took a while to come up with the decision, but they needed sometime to find out what a tuxedo was.

Mexican telecom mogul Carlos Slim is the richest person in the world. I don’t want to say there’s a big gap between the rich and the poor in Mexico but the second richest Mexican man does my lawn every weekend.

According to a recent survey, one in ten joggers say they have sex every day. The other weren’t fast enough to catch the woman.

Joe Biden went to Israel to work on the Mideast peace process with Israel and the Palestinians. He did a great job and got both Israel and Palestine to agree on something, that Joe Biden should shut up.

Senators Lindsey Graham and Chuck Schumer proposed a national ID card for everybody who has a job in America. This is the right time to do it because we probably need 10 to 15 cards.

A writer posed as 10-year-old pen pal to get letters of advice from famous people. He got tons of responses including an invitation from Madonna to go out clubbing.

According to a recent study the business that GPS users search for the most often is WAL-MART. Because if you own a GPS system you probably never shopped at Wal-Mart.

Tiger Woods will make his big return to golf at the Masters in Augusta, Georgia. Things are a little different now, his caddy will carry the bag with the clubs and Elin will carry Tiger’s balls.

Federal authorities have charged a trendy Santa Monica sushi restaurant with serving whale meat. Apparently people became suspicious because the house dish was called: Tilikum

The Internet has been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Are you serious? You know all the fights the internet has started in my house every time my wife caught me checking porn?

The Internet has been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. If it wins that’ll be the second Nobel peace prize for Al Gore.

A new method of brain scan can reportedly allow researchers to read people's thoughts. Can we start with Lindsay Lohan so we finally know what the heck she was thinking when she sued E-Trade?